Welcome to little shambles: is the nation in disarray or are we just Brexit-Blasé?
By now, and after ten months of Brexit tribulations, surely like me, you must have become completely and utterly blasé to what Teresa May and her little cronies are up to down the downs of number ten at Downing Street. If you, in fact, appear to have caught the so called "BB" or "Brexit-Blasé" factor, then do not panic. This happens to be a well known phenomenon. People who displayed similar symptoms were prescribed a course of media antibiotics and advised to get some rest from British news for the foreseeable future and until further notice.
Other specialists, highly recommend that you make your way to the nearest souvenirs shop and procure yourself the best trinket with "Keep clam and Carry on" written on it in big letters, and preferably and printed on the nation's flag. Put it on display in your cabinet or on your desk or kitchen worktop, somewhere where you can see it at all times.
Others recommend that you buy or download Teresa May's BmB hit and play it en boucle until your head gets dizzy and you start feeling inebriated. They reckon it's the only way to make the Brexit maim not hurt so much.
No doubt, most of us still remember Teresa May's most acclaimed statement which made it to the top of the charts in the UK and gained her international acclaim. The statement she made on the aftermath of the EU Referendum.
"Brexit means Brexit", she proudly declared as she rustled her feathers and shook away the nation's last hope of ever regaining sanity again. The whole nation was in disarray, the currency was plummeting, shareholders were panicking and major foreign Corporations were getting their poop in a group ready to hit the road should shit hit the fan.
Meanwhile, Teresa, heroic and brave, held her head up high, faced the crowd and spoke into the microphone those magic three little words: "Brexit means Brexit".
Probably, the most infamous, oops sorry meant 'famous', 3 little words since Marilyn's "happy birthday Mr president" to JFK back in the sixties and yes, I know how to count! That makes it four words not three but frankly I could care less!
Moving on... of course, the reason why it's so famous is because the two were allegedly having an affair and Great B's affair with Lady Europa sadly ended in a nasty break up.
They say it's a nasty divorce but those are of course only rumours. These two were never married in the first place. Yes, I know, they lived in sin, isn't that shocking?
GB, it is rumoured, "always felt too good" for Lady Europa and Lady E. should have seen it coming".
It turns out GB, has always had a terrifying fear of commitment. "Great B was always on the sidelines anyway!", said a next door neighbour who preferred his names not to be mentioned at this stage. "For starters, GB never signed the schengen agreement which meant that the latter never really fully committed to Lady Europa," said the same neighbour. "GB also insisted on having separate assets by not sharing the same currency.., kicking off and threatening to walk out until Lady E gave in to those demands", added another one.
"It never goes well after that," she continued, "You give-in to their demands and they start taking you for granted".
Others argue that these are casting aspersions and that things in fact could not be any better for Lady Europa and GB who are both in perfectly good terms.
Sadly, these are the little shambles of a post-Brexit rhetoric but the fact remains that the rest of us are left in a political and economic mess that is not going anywhere any time soon.